I had a really good weekend but it flew by. It is my mother’s birthday on Thursday so I met up with her over my sister’s place. My sister gave us both a haircut and then we lounged around for a bit till we finally got motivated to go get a mani/pedi. Don’t get me wrong I am far from a girly girl. Getting my hair done and a pedicure are far from routine for me. Even having my sister being a hairdresser, I probably get my hair cut less than most. My sister is just the opposite of me. She is all into that kind of stuff. Well I wanted to spend time together rather then just meet up for dinner somewhere. As I get older, I have realized how quickly life goes and I really cherish the time that I spend with my mom and sister. As my mom got a manicure she had a permanent smile. It was probably one of the best gifts we could give her: time together.
The great weekend lead to a not so great Monday. I could not fall asleep last night for the life of me. 12:30 rolled around and I was still up. When the alarm went off at 5:30 it was a struggle to move. Things just started going wrong: Leaving the house I fell down the stairs on my bum and had to run back inside and change because my pants were soaked, my lunch leaked all over the bag it was in, I forgot to pack t-shirts in my gym back and had to buy some at the company store on lunch and an early meeting turned ugly when I was put on the spot and just couldn’t think from lack of sleep.
I am not sure why I did not sleep well but last night the anxiety started. I think it is a mix of pre-FET jitters and fear of another failed cycle, worry about transfer falling on days I NEED to be at work and starting a new class. I think another thing that is bothering me is that this is the month I would be giving birth if IVF #1 had worked. I feel a sense of loss.
I at least went to the gym and had a great workout. I did some weight lifting circuits and then 30 minutes of cardio. I did a walking treadmill workout but added some running at the end.