5dp5dt ~ Banned from POAS

As the weekend winds down my stress levels are on the rise.  My anxiety is only increasing as we get closer to the OTD.  The Beta Test is on Friday and I took a half day.  I figure if it is good news we will celebrate and if it is bad news I do not want the water works at the office.  I will go in for blood work in the morning and will get the call some time after noon.

My transfer was on Tuesday and I spent Tuesday and Wednesday on my butt.  This was my view for about 2 days straight.

Thursday we spent Thanksgiving with my family up North.  It was good to get my mind off of things and I was antsy after two days of being a “couch potato.”  My dad’s girlfriend cooked for us and it was our first Thanksgiving spent with my father in about 6 years.  We usually spend it with my mom.  Turkey looked perfect….

Friday and Saturday were filled with…..not a whole lot.  Which brings me to today….5dp5dt or 10dpo.  I did test today and yesterday only to see a BFN.  My emotions are all over the place.  One minute I am sure that this one worked the next I am almost in tears wondering what our next plan of action will be.  I am scared.  Not seeing a positive yet is making me more nervous.  I know it is early.  Too early to be worried.  But I am still feeling down.  My husband banned has made me promise not to test again till Wednesday.  At that point I would be 8dp5dt and if it was going to be positive it would most likely show up by then.  There are those rare cases where it takes a long time to show up but if I see a negative I will continue to test till Beta Day but I am going to assume this cycle was a bust.  As far as symptoms, I have not had many.  I was crampy day of transfer but that is because it took the doctor about 15 minutes to get everything situated.  We went ahead and transferred two beautiful blasts.  He did not give me the grade but here they are before they thawed……the “twins”

I think they did assisted hatching on them like they did last FET.  It is kind of protocol for FETs at the clinic if they are not hatching already.  Back to the symptoms…..I am bloated/full but that started around Thanksgiving when I started to stress eat.  Pretty sure this just has to do with an increase in salt and carbs.  I have had some “twinges,” cramps and weird pulsing sensations.  I looked at last FET and I had the same cramps and twinges as I do now so that’s not anything promising.  The only different feeling was the pulsing/poking on my left side but who knows I may have experienced it before.  It happened once or twice yesterday and today a few times and does not last long.  Maybe 10 to 15 flutters and then it disappears.  I really can’t describe it but it is on left side further in then where my ovary is.  Oddly enough I am feeling it right now.  The thing is I am super sensitive to everything so any pain, pinch, ache could all be in my head.   I have had no spotting, sore boobs, increased smells, etc.  I am not sure what to think.  I want this to be the cycle.  I don’t think I can take another failed one.  Now I have 3 sleeps till I get to test again.  Hmmm…how will I make it?

13 thoughts on “5dp5dt ~ Banned from POAS

  1. Courtney says:

    I only tested as early as I did because I had implantation spotting way early. Before this pregnancy, 7dp5dt was my test day. 5dp5dt is too early for many, especially FETs. I like the sound of your twinges. I had that with Matthew. None with this one though. Of course, my breasts still don’t hurt yet and with Matthew, they did before beta. you never know, but those twinges are exactly what I felt with Matthew and the timing is perfect for you.

    fingers crossed for you!!!

    • Kim says:

      I really hope it was something. I have never felt anything like it before and never had it any other cycle. It was on and off all night. It’s gone now but I feel those cramps like I am about to get my period. I know I won’t because of the PIO and I am hoping that is a good sign! Usually at this point 6dp5dt I knew I was out but this time feels different. I have so much hope!

  2. road2ourbaby says:

    This sounds great to me! I definitely had those twinges and pulses, usually concentrated more on one side. I hope it’s one or both of those little embryos implanting nicely! Other than that I didn’t have many symptoms. Fingers crossed!

  3. immotileturtle says:

    Are you back at work or off still? If you’re off then DVD boxsets & a good book help to pass the time. If you’re in the office then at least that will provide some sort of distraction. I’m sending you lots of sticky vibes xxx

    • Kim says:

      Thanks! I am back to the office today 😦 I am trying to stay away from google but it’s really hard not to look up every little symptom. This TWW sucks!

      • immotileturtle says:

        It so does. No matter how many times I read people’s blogs where they said that they would rather stim than go through a 2ww I just thought that they all were wrong and there could be nothing worse than injecting yourself with hormones every morning. Turns out they were right & I was wrong, 2wws are total headf**ks and I hate that the concept even exists. I long to wake up one day feeling sick and realise that I haven’t had a period in a long time. Oh, to be fertile!

  4. marwil says:

    These last few days before testing and knowing you probably will get an accurate answer is brutal. Every failed cycle is so hard to handle, I really hear you on that one. I hope this is it for you!

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